Tribute to Rap Replinger

[kani-lehua]

he haole ho'olohe 'ole i kauoha.
kani 'ole'ole ka waha 'o holonalu.

let's just keep slaughtering the language.
_________________
"chaos reigns within.
reflect, repent and reboot.
order shall return."

micorsoft error message with haiku poetry

[Holonalu]

And whats better? To make an effort and perhaps not get it 100% correct, or to make no attempt at all? If my writing offends then don't read it, or provide correction/suggestions if you feel it warrants such. Sorry, didn't go to private school........

ha awi mai imaha....
and yea, my spelling sucks!!

[kani-lehua]

uh, excuse me! i DID make the suggestion of the spelling and you went OFF! this has nothing to do with going to a private school! i even said that, i could be wrong. i can bet that you will continue to offend not only me, but others as well.

carry on, tom. carry on. guess everyone has their own reason for not posting here at mauinuiolelo any more. you have just given me mine. a one man forum. right up your alley.
_________________
"chaos reigns within.
reflect, repent and reboot.
order shall return."

micorsoft error message with haiku poetry

[Holonalu]

EH!!!!! It stay da kine makani nui out tonight or what??? I mean da wind stay blowin so hahd off da mountain dat even Russells VW campah bus stay da kine doin da hula already an he is in dea all bu himselfs!! Yep, it is one windy buggah hea in da cahport to, da blue tarp da nephews wen put up lass yeah stay blowin all ovah da place, so I goin get Russell for nail em down again... Oh yea, almos wen foget,,, It stay 2:27 in da mornin hea in lovely downtown Waimanalo, an, juss in case you nevah wen guest em, dis is Doctor Shaka, da doctah fo da shaka, right hea on da intranet radio ting, whea, dis mornin, we goin be takin all your da kine calls bout anyting dat stay buggin your okole,,, try wait, dis blue tarp flyin all ovah da cahport makin me lolo already,,,, EH!!!! RUSSELL!!!!!!!! RUSSELL!!!!!!!!!!

WHAT!!! I STAY SLEEPIN ALREADY!!!!!!

GET OUT HEA ALREADY!!!!!!! FIX DA TARP!!!!! SUCKAH STAY BLOWIN ALL OVAH DA PLACE!!!!!

KAY!!! OKAY!! NO NEED YELL!!!! JUSS GOTTA FIND HAMMAH!!!! Wow, Uncle, she stay makani nui or what out?

Yep!! Plus, stay da kine blowin from evry which way!!! Get off da Ko'olaus, den off da park,, den from da Kailua side!!! Eh,, juss anykine!! but, leass stay cool, yea?

Yea,,, nice an cool, but, I was tryin fo get some moe moe, been workin plenny xtra shiifs da Seven Eleven store, tryin fo make some extra kala fo da holidays an all dat... How you stay Uncle, nevah wen see you long time,, lass time you was all da kine long face,, get some kine pilikia, like problems?

Nah,,, not really... juss wen tick off one wahine,, now she all huhu wit me,,

why is dat? you wen say sometin wrong?

Nah, dont tink so,,

You stay owe her money or sometin lie dat?

Nopes,, dats not it,,,

Let me guess,,, she drive one Acura, an you wen tell da 22 nephews, an now her cah stay missin?

Nopes, dats not it either,,

Then juss what is da pilikia?

Spellin...

What!!?????? She all huhu juss cause of spellin?

I tink so, plus, she tink I stay insultin evrybody,,

Uncle, you nevah wen insult anybody,, in fact, i nevah hea you talk stink bout anybody,, maybe she was juss havin one bad day?

Yea,,, dats wat i tink,, plus, i tink she wen move or sometin lie dat,, maybe she no more know anybody at her new place,, can be hahd you know,, move someplace, nevah know anybody, evryting stay all da kine new an diffren.. You know what i mean?

Nopes..

Well,,, shoots,,, anyways,, whea was we? Oh yea... It stay all da kine blowin up juss like one storm dis mornin, only ting, NO MORE DA STORM!!! JUSS WIND!!! But dats still okay, long as da lights no go out lie lass time,, had da kine stention cords goin evrywhea, to da neighbors house, one cross da street to Kawika Olepewahanuis' house, so he can keep da outside lights on, keep one maka on all his daughters,, juss in case da local Nalo boys stay on da prowl.. Eh, Russell, you evah wen meet Kawikas' daughters?

Nopes,,

why not?

Not even allowed to look at em!

Why? You still get da slap in da back of da po'o evrytime you stay lookin at one oddah wahine?

Yeps,, an da suckah hurts plenny evrytime da ex ex ex almos was da kine future ex girlfren trows back of da head blows, even long distance kine!!

Taught you was goin get one new girlfrend already??

No can!

How cause no can?

Cause, da ex ex ex almos was da kine future ex girlfren says I stay commited already..

Howz dat? Commited? You mean lie da kine padded cell Kanehoe state menta hospital kine commited?

Nopes!! I stay financially commited,,, was tryin fo add em all up juss da oddah day,,, teriyaki chicken,, bus fare to Waikiki, da teriyaki chicken bills fo lunch, dinner an breakfast at Harrys Underwater Bar, Hotel an Restaurant, rent fo da room, den bus fare back, plus da time I gotta take off work fo go Waikiki,, eh, da suckah adds up in one hurry!!

So, how much kala, as in money, we stay talkin bout?

I'd radder not tink bout it,, juss goin give me one headache..

You mean da long distance head slap kine?

Nopes, da oddah kine, almos mo worse,, but not quite da same...

Well, Russell, while you stay busy wit nailin da tarp back down, I goin take some intranet da kine radio ting calls, you know, try fo help out da folks out dea, cause, wit da holidays comin up already, get plenny people stressin out and callin in.. what you no, we already get one callah!!! Aloha an howzit,, dis is doctor Shaka, whats on your na'au?

Whats on my what??

Your na'au,, you know, your mind??

Oh, yes, of course, my mind.... Well, we've just recently moved to the fiftieth state,,

TRY WAIT!!!! eh,,, Russell!!!! Dis guy on da intranet radio ting says we one state!!! Whats up wit dat?

I don know!!! We one state already???

Not sure??? Oh well,,,,,,,,,,,,, GO AHEAD CALLAH....

Yes, as I was saying, we have just recently moved here, and are considering having a Thanksgiving dinner party, you know, invite all the neighbors, have all kinds of food and deserts and things to drink, do you have any idea as to just how many people we should invite?

Well, callah, dat is one xcellen question... You know, we had a Tanksgivin pahty hea in lovely downtown Waimanalo juss lass year, an had plenny people, lie ovah 100, at leass!!! Of course, evrybody was sposed to bring sometin, cause, food ain't cheap!!!! So, evrybody wen bring sometin. Was only one slight pilikia, like problem, some of da people I was lookin at, I didn even recognize!!! I was lie all da kine,, "Wow?! Juss who is does people?? Don tink I evah wen see dem befor!!". Den, I stay tinkin, "Eh, maybe day is related to da wife? Or maybe day stay related to Russell? Or maybe da 22 nephews? Natan? Maybe Captain Frieitis,,? Course, if day wen bring bee,,,,,,,,

UUUURRRRPPPPP!!!!!! SCUZE ME!!! DID I HEAR SOMEBODY SAY BEER!!!???

Wow!!! Captain Frietis!! I nevah even wen say em yet!!!

Yeh!! But you were about,, uuuurrrrpppp, scuze me, to, weren't you?

Yeps, I was,,, no need even ask,, juss go ahead an help yourself, get plenny cold pia in da cahport fridge.... Eh,, Captain Frietis,,, you was at da Tanksgivin pahty in da cahport lass yea, right?

Yep!!! Sure was!!!! I brought the great big,, uuuurrrrpppp, scuze me, cooler on wheels!!!

Yeh,,, but as I recall, da cooler, even dough was gigantic, was empty?

No, Uncle, you got that all wrong,, it was packed, almost to the top!!!

Yeh,,, but was juss ice!!

Yep!!! Sure was!!! Don't expect me to drink warm beer,, do you??

Nopes, guess not,,, leass you wen bring sometin!! Eh, you remember dat family dat wen show up? You no, da ones I was askin you if you wen know em?

You mean the ones that brought the,, uuuurrrrpppp, scuze me, cheeseball assortment?

Yeps!!! Dose was da ones! Da one guy was kind of short, had da squinty eyes, and looked kind of crazy!!?

You mean the guy that Russell said looked like Dick Cheyney?

Yea!! Dat was da guys!! did you know em or what?

Nopes!! Thought you did?
be continued, weather permitting